Wednesday, 22 November 2017

Cupboard Love - a 100 word story

Here's my story based on the photo prompt for Friday Fictioneers.



Cupboard Love


PHOTO PROMPT © Rochelle Wisoff-Fields



The waiter had a Gigolo smile and cheekbones so sharp they could slice bread. Rita checked her creased cleavage.
He returned with coffee.
"Thaaank you.” She jiggled her bosom.
The waiter tensed. Oh, she knew that look!
“Madam is welcome.”
His accent was delectable.
“Your English is good, but I could teach you more. I’m very experienced.” She glanced down suggestively, thus missing the horrified look that swept across the waiter’s face as he fled.
Rita smiled. With patience she'd reel this little fishy in.
And she had some tape left in her closet from the last one.  


I hope you enjoyed reading this and look forward to reading your comments.


If you would like to read more stories from Friday Fictioneer contributors click HERE

p.s. a quick plea to Wordpress bloggers whose settings require people to log in to their Wordpress account in order to leave a comment - this prevents Blogger users like me from leaving comments on your stories.

66 comments:

  1. Thanks, Neil. She's a clever, sinister lady.

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  2. Dear Susan,

    Cougar alert! He's smart to run...and keep running. Well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

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    1. Thanks, Rochelle - I think it was her creased cleavage that scared him off! But will she get him in the end?

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  3. I hope the waiter keeps running! Good fun.

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  4. Maybe this one will get away...Nicely done.

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    1. Thanks, Lore - he might get away, but she's "very experienced"! :)

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  5. She's a naughty one. Love the playful, wicked edge to this.

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    1. Thanks, Karen. Even older women can be 'bad'!

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  6. The predator baiting her trap. I couldn't help but think about whether or not he might be gay.

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    1. Who knows, James? I thought he was simply freaked out by being chatted up by an older woman. :)

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  7. Excellent twist at the end. I liked the gigolo smile, too!

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    1. Thanks, Penny. Glad you liked the story.

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  8. Yikes! A real femme fatale. Hope he doesn't get tempted by the opportunity to 'improve his english.'

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  9. "Creased cleavage" certainly does conjure up an appropriate image here.

    I've known a couple of Ritas in my life.

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    Replies
    1. Ha ha - and did you run for your life, I wonder? :)

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    2. When I was in my teens, twenties, and early thirties, I don't think I ever ran from any woman, although there certainly were some I should have avoided!

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  10. Rita somehow reminded me of Samantha from sex and the city except that Samantha wasn't dangerous, as such.
    He was smart to exit on time.
    Superbly written.

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  11. Yikes. Run fast, Waiter. Danger in the room!

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    1. Or will his curiosity get the better of him?

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  12. Ha, he doesn't know what a close call that was! Nice one.

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    1. No, sometimes you have to know when to run.

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  13. It seems that Rita will get her kicks whatever way she can. Some very graphic images here, I could almost see the waiter's face and the coy downward glance of your main character. Good one.

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    1. Thanks, Sandra - glad to know my imagery worked for you.

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  14. Replies
    1. Hi stranger! How are you? Thanks for commenting.

      p.s. Darlene - can you leave a link so that I can find your blog?

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  15. Lucky escape for him, I think!

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  16. Replies
    1. Yes, he really mustn't let her 'reel him in'!

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  17. She's too smart for him - he can run all he wants :D

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    1. That might be the problem for him, Dahlia. :)

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  18. Those words 'creased cleavage' reminds me of an unfortunately placed tattoo I saw once in Tenerife. Nice one, Susan.

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    1. Ha ha - now that did make me laugh, Liz!

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  19. I think Rita may have a little more trouble reeling this one in. You set the scene well - I could see it perfectly.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks, Irene. (She'll enjoy the challenge.)

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  20. Nice one. There is a Hemmingway quote that could apply to Rita's fishing skills “You roll back to me.” :-)

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  21. Rita sounds like a cougar with fangs and claws, a dangerous animal. The waiter was right in following his instincts. Good writing, Susan. :) --- Suzanne

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  22. Such women scare me. Good take though.

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  23. I like wicked stories, normal is so boring. Two thumbs up.

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  24. Somehow I have a feeling that she will have some trouble reeling him in this time around.

    Maybe the waiter is gay.

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    1. Ha ha - maybe! You're not the only one who made that speculation. I think it's more likely he was disturbed by that creased cleavage!

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  25. I have one piece of advice for him - run! Love your details. Susan, the cleavage, the suggestive wiggle. Well written story

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    1. Thanks, Lynn - glad to know you enjoyed the story and appreciated those little details.

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  26. Yikes - this woman is more than a little creepy!! A great little vignette!

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  27. She certainly is, Joanne. Glad you liked it. :)

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  28. Scary lady! I like the ambiguity of where power lies here. Good story.

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    1. Thanks, Rachel. It's always so satisfying when readers 'see' what I try to portray.

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  29. So well set up. I hope the poor waiter keeps on running.

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    1. He's vulnerable and Rita knows it, Sarah. Thanks for commenting.

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  30. It was cougary creepy enough before the tape.

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  31. Uh oh, There is evil planning in her seduction. Love the closet twist in your story.

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  32. Thanks for your comment, Susie. Yes, she's got plans for him!

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  33. Loved your descriptions, especially "creased cleavage" and "gigolo smile". I feel sorry for the "fishies" she catches! Creative take on the prompt.

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  34. This story made me smile because I didn't expect the ending. Well done in disguising where you were going. Clever twist for the photo prompt.
    Isadora 😎

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  35. Thank you, Isadora. I'm glad my surprise ending worked for you.

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